Teens in Abusive Relationships

What is abuse?

Abuse is a pattern of behavior where one uses power and control over their partner to get what they want.

What are the signs of an abusive relationship?

It is sometimes hard to recognize the signs at the early stage of a relationship. Many signs of abuse don’t occur until the later stage when things start going bad. There are signs that let you know that your relationship may or become abusive.

Here are some signs of abuse:

1. Always jealous

2. Gets mad when you don’t listen to him/her

3. Gets mad if you didn’t tell them where your going

4. Him/her isolates you from your friends

5. Restricts your social life

6. Don’t take responsibilities for his/her actions

7. Your partner calls you names and make you feel useless

8. Calls to check on you 24:7

9. Grab or shake you all the time when him/her gets mad

10. Your partner makes choices for you

11. Constantly criticizing

12. Threatening suicide if your partner wants to breakup

13. Your partner accuses you of cheating

14. Threatening to find someone else

15. Public humiliation

What are some reasons for abuse?

1. Power and control

2. Abuse during childhood

3. Jealousy

4. Peer pressure and gender roles

5. Uncontrollable anger

What are some reasons why a victim might stay?

1. Hope that things will change

2. Fear that your partner will not let go

3. Low self confidence

4. Romantic ideal that love conquers all

5. Does not understand the consequences

6. Believes him/her when they say “I’m sorry”

7. Because your partner is popular

8. Feel sorry for the abuser

There are many different types of abuse:

1. Physical abuse- hitting, grabbing, and pushing

2. Sexual abuse- rape- forced penetration without consent

3. Emotional/Mental/Verbal-using putdowns, insults, and name calling

It is never your fault when you are in an abusive relationship. When you are in an abusive relationship, it is very hard to get out of it. It is sometimes hard to get out of an abusive relationship because you are afraid of what your partner might do. You are scared of what him/her reaction might be. When your partner realizes that you don’t need them anymore, it gets them even more upset. Your partner excuse for always being jealous all the time or wanting to know where you are or what you’re doing 24:7 is that they love you. Always using love for their actions. In abusive relationships, 95% of the time the boyfriend is the one that is doing the abusing.

Note:

Being abused is not an easy thing for a person to handle. When you are being abused, you always think the following:

1. What did I do to deserve this?

2. Why is he/she doing this to me

3. Doesn’t he/she love me

4. Should I try to get out of this relationship?

5. What can I change about myself, that will make he/she stop hitting me?

6. Should I tell someone that I am being abused?

You never think that you will end up in an abusive relationship. And when you do end up in one you never know what to do. But I will tell you what to do when you are in an abusive relationship.

5 Things You Should Do When You Are In An Abusive Relationship

1. Admit to yourself that you are being abused

2. Talk to someone

3. Have faith in yourself and know that you are not the one to blame

4. Confront him and let your partner know what he/she is doing isn’t right

5. Get out of that relationship immediately

I know that it’s hard, but you have to do it.

Kimberly also wrote about anger and stress management.